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Driving Results: When to Use Emotion and When Not To

 
As a leader your job is to drive results.

"Check your emotions at the door" is advice I've heard many times. Sometimes that is appropriate advice. Other times, we would be better served to put our emotions front and center.

Let's distinguish between when we are best served between using our emotions and when to leave them out of the equation.

 It is not the best time to use your emotions when you are in fact-gathering mode.

The first mandate of leadership is SEE THINGS AS THEY ARE,...

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You Can't Influence People If You're Judging Them

 
Have you ever set a goal to become a better leader?

One of the biggest and most important attributes of leadership is influence.

However, you can't influence people if you're judging them. Believe me when I say they can feel it if you do. They will hear it in your voice, see it in your facial expressions and feel it in the way you come across. They know.

A key to becoming a great leader is to stop judging. Instead - get curious. Take a look at the person.

If you want to influence someone, you...

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Change: The Problem Isn't "Out There"

 
Have you ever had a result you wanted to create in your life and you thought "If only this person would do this..." or "If only this person would not do that...then I could create this result?"

As soon as we think the problem is "out there" THAT is the problem!

In his classic best seller "7 Habits of Highly Effective People," Stephen Covey tells us in the very first habit to "Be Proactive."

In a nutshell this means you are responsible for the results you get in life.

We get...

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The Power of Chunking

 
Have you ever come up with an idea that just keeps floating around in your head? And you fail to take action on it?

You're not alone.

Often, when clients have a plan, they attack the plan. For some - the problem is creating the plan. This is especially true if the result or outcome they seek feels big or overwhelming.

As a coach, I look for patterns. If a pattern doesn't serve the client, we work to break it.

One such pattern is writing on their "to-do list"  big outcomes that...

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Three Things Leaders MUST Do

 
Do you want to be a better leader?

So often clients say one of their goals is to be a better leader. I say "Great! How will you know when you're a better leader?" That is often met with either silence or a comment like "Hmmm. That's a great question."

What do leaders do, anyway? What does it mean to be a leader?

There are three things a leader MUST do.

  1. Get in touch with the facts. See things as they are. Keep emotion out of it at this stage. Don't over-dramatize things or put on a set of...
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Are you using the best 3 letter words to ask the best questions?

 
Which three-letter words am I talking about?

How? Why? and Who?

So often we ask "how" questions. It starts at a very young age. "How do I spell this word?" "How do I brush my teeth?" "How do I tie my shoe?"

"How" questions are strategy questions. And strategies are a dime a dozen. You can find the answer to any question, 24/7, without even leaving your couch thanks to the power of the internet. 

Success in business, and in life, is 80% mindset (psychology) and 20% strategy.

If you want...

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Words have meaning

 
Have you ever felt like you stuck your foot in your mouth?

Words have meaning. The words we use matter.

Small shifts in language have a positive impact in your day. My most successful clients master their emotions...and language is one of the tools they use to do it.

What do you catch yourself saying all the time that could benefit from a small shift in your vocabulary?

Have you signed up for the free training on Advancing Your Executive Presence? Click HERE for more info. 

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Fear is Like Whack-A-Mole

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What stops us from moving forward? From taking action? From being our best selves?

One word: FEAR.

Fear can look many different ways. It can look like fear of failure, a fear of success, fear of losing something (money, love, respect), or even fear of the unknown!

Fear is like a game of Whack-A-Mole. Deal with it one thing at a time. 

You don't have to conquer all fear at once. That's not going to happen so pressure off! 

Fear isn't an IF...it's a WHEN??

We don't know when,...

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Does Acting Confident Feel Phony to you?

 
Have you ever been told "Fake it until you make it?"

The problem with that is no one wants to feel like a fake. No one was to be or feel phony.

"Faking it" implies you're trying to be someone you're not. For you to reach your goals you can't pretend to be that successful person...you must become that person.

Become that person by making an inward decision to be him or her. The outward signs will show up later, as a result of making this decision.

"Overnight successes" are rarely that.

...
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